Hold Me

 

amidst the morning chores, 

the tender thing kept gazing at me, 

and said, 'hold me, dear mother...'

it was the only leaf that 

got left behind 

from being cooked

I said 'sorry' and 

held it for as long as i could.

~ 26 Oct, 23

Anxiety

 

There was a constant chatter 

in my head. 

I kept waiting for you 

at the doors of my phone.

I sighed and told myself,

"Blessed are those 

who have a handful to do"

Then I realized, a tad later, 

that I've been searching and 

waiting at the wrong places.

I had all the love already 

and reassurance is optional.

~Oct 26, 2023

Undress

 

Let me undress you

Real quick... 

I know how a partner 

would wish to get drenched 

by the love of their life

I won't let it go down the drain

cos you've worked so hard

in the scorching sun

to be at this point in life

But this is just not the time...

Dear hanger,

Let me undress you real quick.

I wouldn't mind missing the rain

Just this time!

~ 13 Oct 2023

Compassion and Joy

 

Today, I was at the supermarket picking vegetables and fruits for the week ahead. Among the few of them at the place, there was a really old granny who was also doing her veggie picking. She was accompanied by another old person who was relatively active for her age, and helping her with the buying process. 

At a point in time, I was a feet or so away from her. A moment had come when I had turned to notice her, and she was trying really very hard to bend down to deposit the cauliflower that she had picked, into her basket on the floor. Involuntarily, I reached out to her wrinkled hand, gently took the cauliflower from her, and placed it in her basket. She was obviously surprised by this act and even more surprised to notice that it was not one of the shop's staff who had helped her.

Of course she did not ask for help. Maybe, it could have turned out to be a bad experience for me for being vulnerable: for having taken the risk of offering her my help. In all possibilities, the granny could have been of the kind who gets offended by the fact that someone had doubted her capabilities. Thankfully, that was not the case. She was quick to notice what I just did and thanked me from the bottom of her heart. I accepted her thanks by smiling at her warmly, and moved on.

A few minutes passed by. Now, I was almost crouching to pick fruits from a crate that was placed on the floor. I was too engrossed because I was carefully checking if the fruits were free from insects. Just a few seconds into this act, I noticed someone stooping down to my level and speak to me in the gentlest of the voices I've heard anyone speak to me ever. It was the same old granny asking me to help her pick fruits from the same crate.

I was overwhelming with joy and was moved by the fact that she had welcomed my help in the first act and has now come back to me to take more help without hesitation.

I gladly helped her, and yet again accepted her thanks as well as her blessing that the God bless me abundantly!

~ 07 Oct 2023

Departure

 

For all that I would miss

My heart swells and emotions flare up 

Like the setting half moon in the west

that looks to have gravid and reddened.

I wonder if there's anything to quell...

But we know the drill:

To wait patiently is the key.

For there's hope in 

the many more ‘morrows to come!

~ 22 sep, 2023

Thanksgiving

 

Rain washing the trees' feet...

~ May 30, 2023 

Coconut

 

The coconut is 

like my hardheaded teenager.

I realise this after seeing 

the burning red mole-like scar 

on my little finger

This coconut that I held 

in my palm a few days ago 

And hit hard on its skull 

to get to the fruit...

As a retaliation, 

the split halves fought back 

to seal the crack,

biting my little finger

right at the circle of breach

~ Apr 28, 2023

Cigar

 

A tentative clothes peg

gripped the clothesline

Like

A cigar dangling on the

edges of an insouciant smoker

~ 07 Jan 2023

Sometimes

 

It's a rainy midday, and

there's so much ground to cover 

to finish the day

I feel so much like that solitary bird

sitting solemnly and

so still on a cable

getting itself drenched in the rain

It looked like it was taking on

some self-inflicted pain, 'cos

I hardly noticed any change

in its posture, to adjust

to the cold around

I began to ponder

Why so do we birds throw 

ourselves into such depressing situations?

~ 01 Sep 22

Reverence, Bliss, Thankful

 

There's rain these days

It is few and far between

for it's June.

Day after day,

busyness keeps me from

caressing the pleasure

On one such rainy night,

I close my eyes and lay 

supine on my bed, and pray: 

Don't lure me dear rain

I must rest enough 

to sail through the next day

And then, strangely,

I see flashes under my eyelids 

hear thunder beats in my heart

and feel the chill

of the drops from my skin.

I half-smile and say to myself:

Emulation is 

the best form of reverence,

isn't it?

Then comes my urge to write 

this phrase of bliss. But then,

I skip the thought, and persist

Sleep comes by yieldingly

When I wake up in the morning,

there is none of the usual

rush of troubled thoughts

Instead,

Bliss greets me with cheer 

like bird chirps in a forest creek

Days slip by, and yet...

the thought holds on patiently

Like a dutiful devotee

waiting to be seen,

My thoughts had to be blessed 

and freed by the words

Now, after this writing spree...

How thankful can I be!

~ 01 July 2022

Anaesthetic

 

Anger plays anaesthetic

Numbing my senses

Making me insensible 

It throws me out of balance

and catapults my senses

to the outermost circle 

of perception

It tethers me to an uncertain pole

Things seem to move slow, 

but in an eye's blink 

I spin out of control

It morphs my senses

and shows it to me 

as a stranger to my own self

I do not realise that I must reflect

I pause but I am blank 

I cannot reason my existence 

I forget and cease to feel

I am quiet and exhibit reticence

beyond levels of acceptance 

And I give in and sizzle with chaos

when anger plays me

If realisation has come now

I wonder...

how long will I take

to anaesthetize anger

~ 28 Jun, 2022 

Aces

 

Just the aces when you play with me...

Anger

Anxiety

Aversion

~ 28 Jun, 2022

Body Weeps

 

When I exercise

my body weeps profusely

in sweet gratitude

through each skin pore

Like how we break down

and pour our heart out 

spontaneously,

when we are waiting

for someone to ask about us,

and that thoughtful someone

comes by and checks in

on our deep pain

~ 29 Apr, 22

Torch

 

The morning east sky now looks 

blanched and pale blue

waiting for the orange yolk

Fifteen minutes ago

it was pinkish yellow

like yellow in the traffic lights

signalling us to be ready

Half an hour ago

it was a splendid pink 

announcing the arrival 

of the mighty sun

It all looked like someone

pressed their palm against

a torch's white light

and then revealed it.

~ 28 Apr 2022

When

 

When my twelve year old son says

'Limit your visits

I would not like to be seen with you'

When to ignore and when to take cue

When to cry out loud when to reflect

When to act ignorant

And when to act arrogant

It's the same son 

to whom I was once

the apple of his eyes

Now he looks at me

as his provider and not a parent

~ 20 March, 2022

The Name is Chi

 

In my living room

boys aged ten and twelve

spoke so matter-of-fact about

teen-pregnancy and termination

and with so much gumption 

The elders too listened

without reprehension, and

not a single being thought

it was impudent to discuss 

about who was the cause

Not one in the house 

judged, blamed, or cursed

the pregnant being for

such an act of promiscuity 

There was just sympathy.

Everyone's exclamation must

either be, what's with this family 

and how such insanity, or

oh! what amazing adults

and how so progressive!

But, neither is true.

Not that we are people 

who are absolutely carefree.

We were discussing 

about our cat so puny, and

whatever maybe the adversity

we'll take good care, 

in all our capacity, 

of cats named 'Chi'.

~ 13 Mar, 2022