Still Around - A Year Later

Still Around, A Year Later 

It is 11:00 pm, after a long day

And have closed my eyes...

Intending to sleep,

Attending to each of my thoughts

As part of the regular rumination 

After a few seconds,

I see my dad walk down 

the stairs of our house.

He's at the main door.

It's broad daylight.

He walks towards me

in his usual gait,

firm and casual,

with no apparent pain

of his end years.

I notice the fresh blood 

on his forehead.

I know that this is 

of the clot 

that I discovered

so many hours later,

on the day of his death.

He asks, shall we?

I say, Yes, I am ready.

To be part of today's occasion

of laying our house's cornerstone.

~ 05Dec2024

Grief

 
A day or two later,
You are not sure if you are weeping 
You are not sure why you are weeping 
There are times,
You are not sure why you smiled 
at that old woman on the street 

And then,
You wonder if you ever smiled
at dad while he was still alive. 
and chidingly tell yourself...
What kind of daughter you were!
And sulk even more.

After a few days of not crying 
You think you have grieved, enough. 
Or at times, when you don't grieve,
You say, 
'See.. I told you. Grief is overhyped.' 

But, No. Out of nowhere, 
there are moments of 
'a very still life'
So much... that you wonder 
If there is still life.

Like, a few weeks later,
You are hurriedly paring the pineapple 
that kids need for their snacks break
And you don't curse but cry 
if when the knife dad had used was 
not sharp enough...

Now, no doubt. 
That is Grief.

~ 18Jan24 to 05Feb24

Sea's Handiwork

Waving to the shore.